A sucker for love
and a hopeless cause
clocks tick slowly
and I am pierced to a platform.
Trapped by ellipses
muddled by so many words
holes swapped for a soul
and a lamp post
lighting my way.
I am fearful of the dark, now.
(c) 2011
Pierced to a Platform
25
Jul
Jingle
July 29, 2011 at 2:37 am
haunting, hopeful words.
love the imagery.
welcome and happy rally.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 2:58 am
Thank you Jingle
Apologies if I haven’t been able to comment on others poems, I’ve been unwell. I’ll catch up ASAP.
jsendslove
July 29, 2011 at 6:24 am
Loved this!
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:05 am
Thanks!
D
July 29, 2011 at 2:07 pm
I love, love this.
Short yet it evokes powerful emotions.
When we are trapped we become helpless.
As Dumbledore said: “Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.”
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:00 am
Thank you so much. Being trapped was very much the focus of the poem.
Fountains
July 29, 2011 at 4:00 pm
Such despair. I like the phrase “pierced to a platform” and the idea of being “trapped by an ellipses” as well as the imagery of a lamppost. Very sad and gloomy, and a well written poem.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:00 am
Thank you! I wrote the poem around that phrase. It’s the second I’ve written since 2008, so I’m more than a little rusty, so thanks for the positive comment!
CC Champagne
July 29, 2011 at 9:44 pm
I was also captured by the ‘pierced to a platform’ bit… Not so sure I think it’s hopeful, but that is just my take on it. *smile* Well written. Loads of angst there!
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:02 am
Thanks. Pierced to a platform was a sort of play on myself. I have a lot of body piercings, and sometimes the judgement I receive can be a huge, huge negative. I started wondering if perhaps, by modifying myself, I’ve done damage to how people view me.
jennifaye
July 30, 2011 at 4:00 am
“Trapped by ellipses muddled by so many words” — Dark and haunting. You captured the despair very creatively.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:02 am
Thank you for reading!
Aaron Smigielski
July 30, 2011 at 4:12 pm
“I am fearful of the dark now.” What a way to end on! Excellent write.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:03 am
Thank you. I almost didn’t add that ending.
mindlovemisery
July 31, 2011 at 10:29 am
Oh wow intense, powerful imagery!
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:04 am
As always, thank you for reading
cinnamon blues
August 1, 2011 at 1:21 pm
Evocative poem that captured my imagination.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:05 am
Thank you. Imagination capturing is what I like
Jake Wilcocks
August 3, 2011 at 4:41 am
I feel these words in my heart.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:04 am
Thanks for reading and commenting
NAMICOUTURE
August 4, 2011 at 4:43 am
The imagery captured and moved me. Great job
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 3:03 am
Thank you
Ed Williams
August 5, 2011 at 12:24 pm
liking your style!
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 2:55 am
Thank you!
purpleborough
August 5, 2011 at 2:15 pm
Imagery is piercing through the soul of darkness.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
August 8, 2011 at 2:55 am
Thanks for reading