It was September,
The nights were drawing in,
There was a chill in the air, tears in my eyes
…Your body felt cold beside me.
I didn’t know what to say to you
You glanced at me with those lover’s eyes
And I was afraid to search too deeply
I was afraid to look too closely
I knew you could break me
You knew you’d destroy me
I was convinced of your answer
But didn’t want to hear.
Words caught in my mouth,
I choked on the truth
I couldn’t bear to tell you
That I couldn’t stand to lose you.
I sat beside you, close enough to touch
But you were a thousand miles away.
(c) 2006.
Liliana Negoi
November 2, 2011 at 6:29 pm
i think you managed to capture quite well the feeling – closeness is never about physical distance, but about the heart
halfwaybetweenthegutter
November 2, 2011 at 7:28 pm
Yes it is. Thank you very much for your comment.
The Borg Poet (@theborgpoet)
November 2, 2011 at 6:40 pm
Maybe I was afraid..
halfwaybetweenthegutter
November 2, 2011 at 7:28 pm
At the time, I was very afraid. Now I can look back and see that the fear was for nothing, because it was never going to work anyway. As always, thank you for your visit
Ina
November 2, 2011 at 6:46 pm
So sad, and beautiful. A station in the journey of life.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
November 2, 2011 at 7:29 pm
Thank you very much, for reading and commenting. I did wonder if perhaps this poem was a little too abstract to be understood as I don’t really explain why it was written.
The Orange Tree
November 2, 2011 at 7:20 pm
There was a chill in the air, tears in my eyes
…Your body felt cold beside me
sad, long distance passion is hard, but it does survive some times, bless you.
a powerful read.
halfwaybetweenthegutter
November 2, 2011 at 7:31 pm
Thank you for reading! I like how to take it to be about long-distance love; in fact, it was about the break-up with my ex-fiancé, who lived in the same town. However, the emotional distance between us was thousands of miles, no matter how physically close we were.
William Leed
November 2, 2011 at 7:38 pm
Great entry. It goes along well with my entry hey. Communication in the station.
Connection!!
William
disjointedrhymings
November 2, 2011 at 8:12 pm
A beautiful piece, and very true
charlesmashburn
November 2, 2011 at 8:51 pm
A beautiful write. A familiar ache. Words unspoken. You should have danced.
http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/11/02/mom-was-always-there-2/
Kick Out The Jams
November 2, 2011 at 9:23 pm
A powerful piece, to be so close yet so distant, beautifully put.
Daydreamertoo
November 2, 2011 at 10:33 pm
Always wiser in hindsight, when time and distance has taken away much of the sting. Better to know your truth than to have to live a lie in a relationship that was doomed not to last. I always think for any relationship to endure you have to begin as friends, because once the lust wears off ( and off does) what is there left if you really don’t have much apart from sex in common.
Very nice prose.
The Noiseless Cuckooclock
November 2, 2011 at 10:40 pm
HEART BREAKING.
THE WAY YOU SAY IS IS VERY BRILLIANT.
zongrik
November 2, 2011 at 11:38 pm
i like how the thousand miles away tied in with the picture
Nel
November 3, 2011 at 9:11 am
I feel hopeful with this poem. It’s like at that point it may have seemed to be over but somehow it’s not.
close enough to touch
But you were a thousand miles away
Beautiful.
belfastdavid
November 3, 2011 at 9:53 am
Beautifully sad but so real.
A deeply personal poem yet expressing something universal. This is what I think poetry is all about.
David
ZQ
November 3, 2011 at 12:51 pm
Very well written. Love can be the distance of a touch or the abyss of loss. You made me feel that. Cool.
somewhereamelody
November 3, 2011 at 1:15 pm
I love those last two lines. I feel the longing in this poem.
kez
November 3, 2011 at 9:29 pm
distance love is the worse but in some ways the strongest …loved this thank you x
Bar None Group (@barnonegroup)
November 3, 2011 at 9:45 pm
You’ve poignantly captured a bittersweet moment that most of us have experienced. What is it about autumn and new beginnings?
Jo Bryant
November 4, 2011 at 5:55 pm
so sad and poignant
ashbeezone
November 5, 2011 at 3:55 am
Very Nice Poetry
Anyways, Take a look some of my Poetry Collections …
http://ashbeezone.wordpress.com/category/talent-underground/poetry-zone/
some of my Haiku Collections
http://ashbeezone.wordpress.com/category/creative-challenges/the-haiku-challenge/
and also, on my very recent Work as well
http://ashbeezone.wordpress.com/2011/10/22/lend-a-hand/
!!! Happy Rally !!!
Cheers !!
Chevrefeuille
November 5, 2011 at 11:36 am
Thank you for sharing this wonderfull piece of poetry
Julie Laing
November 6, 2011 at 5:59 pm
There is such honest sadness in this piece; I hope you have closed the miles between you and the person for whom it was written. Thanks for sharing this one for the rally.
Jess
November 7, 2011 at 2:18 pm
It’s amazing how two people can be so close and so distant at the same time. Well written.
CC Champagne
November 9, 2011 at 5:27 pm
Extremely sad and so very beautiful… You really managed to pull me into this!
Ryan Auberson-Walsh
November 14, 2011 at 9:10 am
What a splendidly written piece.
I’ve had this horrible feeling many a time and never had the courage or honesty to write something so personal about myself on solid paper, and here you are sharing it with the world.
Applause for all your poetry. It’s solid stuff. :]