Fritter and waste the hours in an offhand way

Diet cherry Coke and The Sims. A joint. My laptop screen. The only things keeping me company as I attempt to pull an all-nighter to reset my body clock. Stupid daylight saving, stupid upside-down sleep weekend.

The weather was beyond glorious over the weekend, and S and I spent most of it sat in his landlord’s garden, smoking, drinking red wine and talking about nothing. On Friday, I sat under the veranda of the pub and waited for him to finish work, nervous with anticipation and apprehension about telling him we’re not going to be able to rent the house. Sat and smoked, feeling a bit paranoid I was being watched; a silly delusion, but happens when I’m stressed.

Of course, I needn’t have worried. I need to stop letting myself panic so much; S has proved over and over he’s not about to run away screaming if I hint at any commitment. We had a drink and I told him I’d had a message from the woman, saying she was going  to sell instead of rent it out. S just shrugged and said, “oh well, we’ll have to find somewhere else then”. We spent an hour or so looking at flats and houses online, and – surprisingly – there were quite a few nice ones within our budget.

I had to let paranoia get a small look-in, so I asked S if he really still wanted to live with me.

“Of course, i want to wake up with you every day, I need to live with you”.

Where did I get that man from? And can I never have to give him back, please?

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20 Comments

  1. I just had a total awww moment! That is too cute. How sweet. I’m sorry about your crappy sleep patterns at the moment. Here our daylight savings is like 2 weeks before your guys’. It was difficult for me, too this time around. Hope you get it sorted out soon. (:

  2. Happy for you! You deserve it :)

    P.s Kicking around on a piece of ground in your home town, waiting for somone or something to show you the way – one of my all time favourite bands. I was raised on Floyd, Time is my second favourite song :) x

  3. I’m SO glad you still can find a place! S is a pretty special guy! He’s sincere!
    We all sometimes find ourselves worrying about things that we don’t have to worry about. Like we over analyze a situation for no reason. But when the outcome turns out better than anticipated, it’s such a relief!

  4. That’s totally awesome that S wants to be with you as much as you want to be with him. And that he takes everything in his stride too, regardless of what it is. He sounds quite laid-back, but not so laid-back that he’d be irritating about it. I hope you never have to give him back too.

    • It is awesome; I admit, I’ve been worried that perhaps I’m seeing our relatinship as more than it really is (as I’ve always done in the past) but unless S is a very good liar… I do think he feels the same way. It baffles me, but it’s a good feeling too. I think it’s his laid-back attitude which compliments me; he helps me see something’s not worth worrying about.

Send me love.

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