Tomorrow never comes.

Woke at 5.30am, reeking of fake tan and feeling wide-awake. A few hours later, I’m sitting up in bed, half-watching the first season of ER and trying to pick dried wax out of my eyebrows and off my face. S is taking me for a meal tonight at our favourite Indian restaurant, so I’m trying to remove all ten tonnes of body hair before he sees me; having polycystic ovaries is a nightmare sometimes. I’ve been managing the symptoms quite well for the past few years – losing five dress sizes almost overnight in hospital helped – but it’s slowly getting worse again.

My diet is failing miserably. I lost 6lbs, then started binging again. Not badly; just enough to halt any progress in its tracks. I’ve been avoiding the Slim-Fast tins in favour of bowls of cereal and toast, convincing myself I’ll get back on track tomorrow.

It’s never tomorrow. I’d do well to remember that.

After the stress of yesterday, I slept like a baby last night. Drifted off around 9pm and slept right through. I’m not even sure I can remember dreaming – which is incredibly rare – and when I woke, I didn’t feel the usual urge to snuggle under the covers and put off beginning the day. Rolled a joint, made a coffee, checked my emails and played some Boggle, all before 7am. Considering I’d been getting up around 3 in the afternoon and going to bed when the sun rose… I think I’m doing well. There’s no doubt it has to be down to the Lyrica; nothing else has changed.

When we bumped into S yesterday, my mother chatted to him about how Lyrica’s worked for me:

“It’s a miracle, isn’t it?”

S gave me a hug and looked me up and down:

“It’s great, it’s fantastic seeing her so bouncy and happy again”

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29 Comments

  1. Yay for meds that actually work! It’s like playing darts with your brain and one finally hits the bullseye — woo-hoo. Good luck with your weight loss. I’m going through the same thing right now, trying to lose, but getting tackled by cravings and bad eating habits. You’ll get back on track. Just keep at it! Take care!

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