I haven’t got room for the pain

Woke at 5pm feeling as though the entire world had crashed onto my body while I slept.

Coffee won’t fix it. Weed helps, but only a little. Everything hurts. Speaking is a chore. Words get forgotten. Tea gets spilled on my desk. Eating is beyond me. Lifting my phone is like carrying a slab of concrete.

I was supposed to be meeting S tomorrow, and staying at his overnight.

Right now I can’t even change my underwear on my own.


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  1. After such a busy, eventful weekend, I’d think the pain, while awful, may be expected. I hope you had a blast, and I hate to say it, but you may have to slow down some. I’m grateful you now have your memorial bench to sit on, in the quiet of the Northern Moors. Happy Easter — 8-)


  2. I lived for years in a place where it took all the strength and fortitude I had to drag myself from bed to bathroom to relieve myself. Take heart, dear one, I made it out of there and I know that you are strong and will make it out, too.

    Meantime I’m sending you love.



  3. My mom had Lupus which is often mistaken for Fibro. I can only surmise that this is what she went through occasionally. She drank heavily to kill the pain. She never told me or sat me down to try to explain things, so I never understood her actions.

    I’m sorry for your pain. I hope you’re feeling better to see S.


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